Excessive

I went to chapters today and ended up picking up a couple of books from the IT department. I got a C++ book that seemed well written and interesting and I also picked up an iOS / iPhone application development book out of impulse. I had thought of teaching myself anyway and being able to read out of a book is enjoyable so I bought it.

I spent the majority of today working on school work... a workplace behaviour project to be specific, and it wasn't too bad. I woke up around 10:00am and had breakfast, the usual toast and coffee, and around 10:30 or 11am I started the school work. I worked on it until around 3pm, and finished it completely. It felt good to get it out of the way, and I was pretty proud of the results.

When I got home from work today, it was around 3:30pm and I was really tired, so I got in bed and ended up napping until around 6:00. I had saved a bit of money this weekend by not having to take a cab Sunday because Julie gave me a ride, so I used that cash to get pizza for dinner, cause I was tired, groggy and hungry, so it seemed like a good idea.

I just had a nice 13 hour shfit at work, but I drank and ate a lot so I didn't get a bad headache or anything. I did feel one coming, so I took a few pills and it actually helped and fought it off. It was pretty busy, we had a stupid Opera menu in the cafe that Julie and Matt had to deal with, and then Kyle, myself and Jeff managed the wedding for 80 people.

I had some issues with a headache this afternoon, and still, in that... the entire time I've been awake today I've had a headache and it's just got worse and worse as the day went on. I've tried to relax and didn't do that terrible of a job, I had some fun, but I would've felt much more content if I wasn't in pain and uncomfortable.

Today I had an in-class assignment in Java and while I did arrive late, the assignment didn't start until an hour into the class, so it was all good. We had a choice of two different problems, one was selecting random numbers between 1-99 and storing them in a data structure that wasn't array, ensuring there were no duplicate numbers and then printing the numbers to the screen. The second option was simply writing a function that will calculate the factorial of a number without use of recursion, and that seemed really easy to me, so I went with that.

I worked on my C++ project today and it was pretty nice. I've got it pretty much done, just need to comment it and polish it, but I'm happy with the results, as I feel they are exactly what is required.

If I am feeling like complete crap, perhaps I need to break free from it for a split second and think about things as objectively as possible. Go to a time where I felt content, and try to extract a theory as to what the causes were for feeling that way and be as honest with myself as possible, and see what I can do or eliminate to try to recreate that same enviroment and circumstances.

I wish I had words in me that I could write down here and feel better but I can't. I feel really scared and uncomfortable. Today turned out to be a pretty bad day... I don't see things turning around any time soon.

I'm lonely and tired and am too scared to go to sleep but feel really scared being awake right now.