Hmm
              
          
          
                          - I lived on Grey St.
 
                          - I worked at Windermere
 
                          - Michelle was my Roommate
 
                      
        
            
              
    
      - I lived on Grey St.
 - I worked at Windermere
 - Michelle was my Roommate
 
I had nightmares last night, lots and lots of nightmares. Â It's so easy to forget just how much of a unique feeling that is, to have a nightmare. Â Such a strange type of terror that doesn't make sense but at the same time seems perfectly real. Â Even after waking up, that feeling persists...
      It isn't always this way
              
          
          
                          - I lived on Grey St.
 
                          - I was with Emily
 
                          - I worked at TNS
 
                      
        
            
              
    
      - I lived on Grey St.
 - I was with Emily
 - I worked at TNS
 
Lately I've felt so ugly... everything about me I've been dissatisfied with, and not the normal way that people always see themselves as ugly, I mean in a disturbingly large amount of disgust. At first I thought it was maybe my hair... maybe my hair was making me feel horridly ugly.. so I cut it, and dyed it, but no, I still feel just as ugly. I think it's a combination of a lot of things. All of my clothes are dirty and I never have anything to wear, my socks are dirty and stinky, I only have about three pairs of underwear left, no pants I really like, and barely any shirts. I just feel dirty and gross and grimey all the time. I want to feel confident like I did in the summer... I want to get some style, feel good about myself.. but not in a stupid way... I'm not sure how to put it without making it seem like normal teen angst stuff... All I want to do is feel comfortable with how I look, and feel good when I walk to work, or walk home from work, or sit at work.. then again, I guess it doesn't really matter what I look like when I'm just sitting at work. I guess it's just a dream of mine...