Excessive

We went to sleep right away and I don't even remember falling asleep really. We slept straight through to about 10am the next day, to which I got up and Bekki opened the curtains to reveal the beautiful water and scenery! It was wonderful, and there was a nice breeze coming in the window, and it was just the perfect way to wake up. I went to bed with a bit of a headache and woke up with it still there in the right side of my head, so Bekki amazingly just rubbed that part of my neck and it helped a bit (she's awesome).

This is a bit different. This is something that I haven't really experienced. I am currently sitting, writing this, in front of ocean water, listening to the sounds of small waves roll in, with a nice breeze running over my legs and arms. This is relaxing, and I don't have to think about anything, or worry, or fear anything. This is relaxation and it's wonderful.

I haven't been writing as much lately, and I think that's because I've been keeping myself quite busy... so busy, and it's a good kind of busy. I feel productive, and like life is happening, rather than this time last year life was stagnant and not moving anywhere, but things are going places, I'm doing things, experiencing things that I've never experienced before and I'm not scared or even anxious.

Today was an okay day, a decent day of work... very tired at home, napped, and now it's already time to think about going to sleep.

I had to start at 6am, but the day went pretty quickly.

For the last week or so I've had terrible pain in my hip. It feels like the joint, but obviously pain in that area of the body can be hard to pin point, but it's effects are noticeable. It's made it so I can't effectively play tennis or bowl properly without suffering great amounts of pain, and if I irritate it at some point in the day, it will continue to ache, or even get worse as the day goes on... even so much that I need to limp to walk. It can cause pain down into my knee and even make my toes feel like they are going numb... it's concerning, uncomfortable and... painful.

I've been suffering from some pretty bad headaches the last day or two, but it was after quite a few days of no problems, so I guess it's alright. Last night got pretty bad and I felt pretty disoriented and out of it, I went through a lot of T1s and felt pretty crappy. I went to bed feeling this way and woke up early in the morning with an even more intense headache... I stumbled to the kitchen and took more pills and crawled back to bed, unsure if I'd be able to fall back asleep with so much pain in my head.

Who would've thought that I'd actually get around to playing tennis in my lifetime. I had always talked about it, and my Mom and I always said we'd try to play and stuff, but I suppose it all just came down to actually buying rackets and getting up the nerves to embarrass myself on a public court.

Today was a busy, irregular day. I was out and about, physically active, and didn't do much of anything I normally do.

After lunch I rode my bike to my Moms, where I helped set up her new computer, and eventually made dinner (mexican rice and chicken) and Bekki joined us when she was done work. From there we rode our bike to the path near the river and played catch for a bit before accidentally throwing the ball in the river. We decided to ride to the store to get some more balls and look at other sports equipment.

It's weird to think that not that long ago I was pretty much hopeless, with little thought of the future - yeah, I knew I hated my job, being yelled at and disrespected, and I knew I enjoyed programming, so my short term goal was to simply open up a new career path, but that hardly could be called a plan for a future. I had pretty much accepted the fact that I would die alone, and was okay with it, and had no plans for the future beyond continuing on and living my life day by day, enjoying the things I enjoy, and avoiding stress. Things aren't like that anymore. My mind is so full of plans for the future that it's difficult to keep track of it all, I have so many things to do, short term and long term, that I feel like I need to start making a long list so I don't forget some things.

I swear I'll make time to write tomorrow.

Today I found out Kairi might be worse than I thought, I went bowling with Ben and Phil, my leg has been bothering me and I'm super god damn tired.